Bad Libs

Well, not much to say...I guess it's time for a few disturbing Mad Libs:

Igloo Fact
An igloo is an Eskimo hitman or hut, which is made from blocks of hard-packed murder. A well-built East River not only provides comfort and warmth, but is also capable of withstanding freezing gats and howling molls.

Johnny Cool, P.I.
George Michael, alias Johnny Cool, hated to make decisions even when his stubble depended on it. He headed in the direction of an all-night grease nestled between a self-service scandal station and a shame parlor. He pushed open the diner loss but didn't enter. The only street lamp on the dark desperation illuminated the fear on his rat tail.

Beauty Advice
If your skin is promising or linty, you can cure this condition with the following regimen: Every morning, before washing your big target, massage it gently with a horror that has been soaked overnight in a shot glass full of warm drool.

Truly, I apologize. Well, I'm off to work now!

Note to Self (re: Valentine's Day)

Sometimes you can be so consumed by the love that you don't have that you fail to see the love that you do. To everyone who had the misfortune of encountering me on VDay '05, to my family who has loved me from day one and my friends who have learned to love me since: You're the bestest ever and I'm a fool if I ever forget that. May God perfect His love in me in the next 364 days (and beyond) and may every day be a celebration of all things pink, red, heart-shaped, sugary and YOU.

Look Ma, Both Hands!

At long last...


(photo courtesy of Fella--Thanks, Red!)

Well I made the belated-birthday-armwarmers delivery today. I secretly wanted to keep them for myself. I guess that will be the 1..2..3..maybe 4th project down the line. So basically, Merry Next Christmas to me.

Fella and I went to lunch today. We ate at a picnic table in the park because I don't have any kitchen chairs left! Speaking of which, I don't know where we'll sit Sunday evening when Boy makes his Sopranos dinner. I guess we'll be eating Italian Japanese style. It's a good thing I bought some socks without holes today. Now I guess I'd better vacuum!

Time to get ready for work! I'm really excited for some reason. Maybe the Squirrel Next Door will pay another visit.

The Squirrel Next Door

Okay, so I may have been stood up the other day at work--but just look who showed up on the doorstep when I went in today.



Those toes kill me.

Knitting is work...Work is play

Mardi Gras was a smash--at least what I remember of it. My boss and I were in charge of adorning the breakfasters with their beads. Of course we got the ol' "What do we have to show to get these?" comments, which I was actually a tiny bit surprised by. I mean, who knew nurses, pharmacists and housekeepers (oh my!) were so frisky at 7:30 am? Then again, it is SP General Hospital. All in all, we were well received, but I have to say that there was one little guy who was utterly terrified by the sight of us in our masks. I'm not just talking "Whoa--You startled me--Ha Ha". I'm talking full-on-deer-in-the-headlights-paralyzed-with-fear reaction. My poor boss felt terrible, but it really was quite funny. I'm just hoping they don't print any pictures in the hospital newsletter. Mass hysteria could very well break out.

I am almost finished with my armwarmer knitting marathon. I've started so many but keep abandoning them because I think of another person that needs a pair. This pair goes to one of my banking ladies as a late birthday present. She admired mine and these are much better, so I hope she likes them! I can't wait to be finished so I can move on to my next project--a sweater--Hooray! If I don't have a picture of the armwarmers tomorrow, somebody kick me!

Happy Birthday, Tot!

Before I sign out, I have to wish Tot a Most Happy Birthday.



(L to R: Tot, #1 Sister, Twin & our friend S.)

Kater Tot,
Having you for a friend makes the mystery meats and canned peas of life a lot easier to swallow.

Mardi Gras for Charity

Well, that must've been one heckuva wallowing Arby's session, eh? No, truth be told, I've actually been a little busy--that is to say, slightly social...I don't quite know why, but suddenly all sorts of people I haven't seen in ages are making reappearances in my life...my friend K., Fella, the ladies from the bank, another K...Strange...but, as my boss would say, I couldn't be thrilled-er.

Speaking of my boss...somehow I got roped into donning fancy clothes and a Mardi Gras mask and passing out hugs and smiles (aww...) at 7:30 in the morning tomorrow! The good news is, it will be over by 9am. Since I usually don't get my carcass out of bed (as mom would say) till then anyway, I figure I can just sleepwalk (sleephug) my way through and go back to bed when it's over. Then by the time I reawake, I won't remember a thing. Now that's what I call a Fat Tuesday.